ignore Portuguese woman on phone and go to car mechanic shop anyway and get helped fine because in Portugal you have 4 different parallel universes: 1) phone, 2) email, 3) IRL without connections, 4) IRL with connections so if you speedrun to friendship you get helped #onlyinportugal

call Portuguese car mechanic shop because we are arriving soon because we talked to them over the phone to make an appointment and the guy said "just drop by", then we called that we we are arriving soon and the Portuguese woman on the phone denies we ever talked to them and says it's impossible to help us today because it's 5.20pm and they close 6pm #onlyinportugal

call EDP to increase effective potencia (power) to 26.7kVa but they say we still at 10.1kVa, even though we increased it with the Portuguese network manager E-Redes to 41.1KvA maximum, but EDP says E-Redes still hasn't activated it after months of asking #onlyinportugal

see sauna wood lying in the garden waiting for assembly by Portuguese sauna guy get wet because he didn't actually tie down the cover properly and so it blew away #onlyinportugal

post my coffee bean ordering story from Lisbon online cafe #onlyinportugal portugalstory.co/p/ordered-co…

see sauna company deliver our sauna today We pay $15,000 i think They just drove all the way to the thing to pick it up The sauna doesn't fit in their truck 😂😂 and they don't have a truck that fits it 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 goonlandia.com #onlyinportugal

post friend in Algarve's #onlyinportugal portugalstory.co/p/you-used-a…

talk to new guy to make outside stairs to roof because previous guy could build a stair but he didn't know anyone to install it (???) #onlyinportugal

see electric blinds slowly start falling down less than 3 months after installation #onlyinportugal

try buy Home Assistant but they only sold by a Portuguese company called mauser.pt and of course their VISA/MasterCard is "temporarily unavailable" #onlyinportugal

hold Portuguese 10L water box where it says "hold here" and of course it breaks and smashes on the floor #onlyinportugal

see parking meter in Lisbon and you can only pay with coins (in 2025???) and the shop guy says who cares don't pay they never check anyway #onlyinportugal

try charge new Tesla Y with Portugal's EDP Charge app but of course there is an error and we can't charge our new Tesla Y in Portugal #onlyinportugal

try sign up to Portugal driving theory school online but the site breaks on sign up instantly #onlyinportugal

buy stairs to main roof but guy can't install it and doesn't know anyone to install it #onlyinportugal

call to get buy car insurance for new car, Portuguese guy says you need to call this number directly, I write down the phone number, I say okay thak you, then he says "I will now transfer you there", I say "Then why did you give me the number", he says "hurdurrrderp" #onlyinportugal

write #onlyinportugal about CTT office aka "a cemetary staffed by witches" portugalstory.co/p/ctt-wont-g…

go to CTT office and they won't give me my package from my own merch store cause I used pseudonym name and that's not allowed in Portugal eventhough I can prove I live at this address and own the house #onlyinportugal

print a screenshot of my iPhone because the Portugal post office CTT will not accept showing my phone with the order but will accept paper print of my screen 😂 #onlyinportugal

try pay the electricity "potencia" upgrade bill with Portuguese MultiBanco bank transfer system, but the "reference number is invalid" so call Portugal electricity network operator and they say we need to always wait 24 to 48 hours for the reference number to processed by the banks, so we should not pay bills immediately in Portugal because as the woman says "you pay the bill too fast, it is better to wait" #onlyinportugal portugalstory.co/p/you-pay-th…