NEED FEEBACK: Cold Mail Outreach for

I have drafted this email and would love to get your feedback to improve it before using it. I appreciate your help guys.


Hi, {{firstname}}

Nice to e-meet you; my name is Jo. I am the founder of platform. I noticed you are using {{AppSumo or Stack Social}} for distribution and to find your product superfans. 

I want to introduce this new sales channel that you can exploit right now. This tool will get you a better conversion rate and easy attribution to your marketing effort. 

Do you realize that we use Twitter and Slack only for distribution and engagement, but not at all for what matters - THE SALE. Well, We Are Changing That With Our Platform - HEYFROMAPP. 

Our team has put together this app, which allows your users to buy your products using a single text message - either in Twitter or Slack. You can combine discovery and sales in the social channel outreach. 

For users, All it takes is one quick setup. After that, it's easy to BUY from any of our platform vendors. It's a frictionless buying experience for users. And, for you, one more compelling sales channel for your products and services.

We call this "OneIMBuy."

I would love to invite you to join our platform and help you add one more convenient sales channel into your mix. 

Why should You join?

- It's a unique experience for your target audience.
- It offers convenience to do business with you.
- It offers you an alternative to Inbound marketing and sales.
 - It offers a better conversion rate and visibility.
- We value relationships. Since our background in product development, We understand your needs better than any established players. And we are transparent in our work with partners.

Your business is the perfect match for our platform. And we are ready to help you onboard in no time.

If you want to find more about how it works, check the link below.

I am looking forward to hearing from you.